This is not the sort of blog that's all "I post my random thoughts from my xcRAZyx life lol!" When we write we write with an audience in mind. But we often just post hilarious youtube videos.
... in the debate over whether 2007 is the greatest or the worst year for music. And please, let's not have any fuddy-duddies*** out there suggesting that it could be somewhere in between best or worst. I mean, after all if you've watched enough of the smartest man in the world you'd know that head size=intelligence because caterpillars have smaller heads than cats, that if we make him our dictator he will solve our problems, that he has "an above-average vocabulary" and that he is "closer to absolute truth than any man has been before [him]." You'd also learn about binary logic: "1 or zero, yes or no- Binary Logic is something you depend on." Watch the video (linked above) because he says it like a spokesperson for some local business council ("our firefighters are people you depend on.") even though he's basically ripping-off Apocalypse Now (read the 9th one down.)
Based on 4 listens, this might be my fave song of the year and it's not even on their album. Rather it's from the collection of B-sides Radiohead offered with their discbox set. Without further ado, Radiohead- 4 minute Warning.
The Wall Street Journal reported today that Apple will release a 3G capable iPhone sometime next year. The story did not specify a release date or even hint at what quarter the phone may come out.
This announcement by AT&T Chief executive Randall Stephenson probably didn't surprise anybody. It has been rumored since the announcement of the original 2G iPhone that a 3G iPhone would come along within a year. While obviously the 3G iPhone would address a major shortcoming of the iPhone, the quality of AT&T's 3G network may continue to overshadow the technology of the iPhone itself.
Google recently released their beta version of "My Location" which allows google maps to map your location without using GPS. This seems like a likely fix for iPhone users as the iPhone lacks GPS capability. What I am curious to see is whether Apple will consider this space and battery saving alternative in lieu of adding GPS to their 2nd Generation iPhone. I'm hoping they add GPS as it does not rely on cell reception to work effectively.
I still love my iPhone as much as I did when I reported on it back in June. It truly is a revolutionary product and I can't wait to see what Apple has in store for the iPhone next year. A gchat widget would be most excellent!
Here's the text of my two favorite posts (neither of which I actually found- thanks sama and fox) right of the bat:
Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.
Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the "loser," and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.
I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.
Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.
When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3×5 card reading, "Please use this M&M for breeding purposes."
This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this "grant money." I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.
There can be only one.
Now the other one:
You: the guy who answers the phone at cottage inn pizza Me: Hungry and stoned out of my gourd
I called you from my cell phone but had completely forgot who I was calling by the time you answered the phone. Of course, you were also baked to bajeezus and forgot to tell me that I had called Cottage Inn.
When you answered and said, “Whatsup?” I thought about it, and after a 20 second pause I told you that was hungry. You suggested I try a pizza, and I agreed that it was probably a good idea.
Then I asked you if you sold pizza and you said that you could make me one. I said I wanted anchovies and something else on my pizza. You asked me what that something else was.
We spent five minutes listing toppings until we figured out that I was trying to remember how to say: “Sun dried Tomatoes.” When you said: “We'll bake that right up for you,” we both started laughing uncontrollably.
It was the best pizza I ever had; I just wanted to thank you for helping me out.
An absolutely surreal picture of Bush visiting a burned group of veterans and trying to smile while he offers one of them what's honestly about the coolest t-shirt I've ever seen. It's here, but be advised- it's pretty brutal
Here's a collection of amazing drinking stories (only 5, and they're historically awesome) and the first one SECOND one, if you read through it, is clearly the greatest drinking story ever.
When I meet new people who are cool, there's a conversation that inevitably happens. I see it coming a mile away, but there's really nothing I can do. Cool people like the Seinfeld show, and in conversation cool people will often reference the Seinfeld show and simply assume that you, as a potential cool person, like said show. What I have to uncomfortably explain, then, is that I in fact never really got into Seinfeld and- though I love Curb your Enthusiasm- going back and watching, I don't seem to really enjoy the show very much.
What I've figured out though is that I have a very Seinfeld-esque reason for not liking Seinfeld, and for some reason that feels appropriate. Basically, I hate the god-damn slap-bass that plays in between every. single. effing. scene. It drives me insane, it doesn't sound like a real slap bass (and I'm quite sure that it's a synth-bass sound,) and they switch scenes so frequently that I guarantee I hear that sound more often than any Seinfeld joke. Isn't that a reason that Jerry himself could appreciate?
It got me thinking about other things like this. I sometimes find myself giving a speech when people ask me "Don't you just LOVE ______ (the Pixies)?" Something like "While I have listened do them and personally don't like them, let me take this time to acknowledge that I realize they are a. by all accounts a fantastic band and b. a band that all of the people I like in fact like. Me "not liking" the Pixies does not pass any judgment on the Pixies."
Here is a short "off the top of my head" list of books/movies/music/TV that I recognize as being almost certainly good/great, while I personally do not appreciate the qualities that make them so: Television (the band, though this could apply more generally) The Smiths Tapes n' Tapes Animal Collective The Magnetic Fields GBV Sonic Youth Scrubs The Simpsons Leo Tolstoy
Books movies music that I DON'T feel this way about (i.e. I secretly think they are actually not good/great, though they are largely perceived as such): Babel Sideways (big ups to Leah for helping me come out) Pynchon Art Brut The Fiery Furnaces Godspeed you Black Emperor South Park Blade Runner
This hard-to-see image is supposedly the new Cosby book called "come on people." Does anyone find this, along the graphic, amusing? I know Lindsay does.
Can a song be imprinted on someone's brain? I've been wondering about this in some form ever since my Dad idly speculated that it may the case for me with the Fleetwood Mac song "Sara." When I was a baby, the only surefire way to get me to fall asleep was hold me and dance gently to the song Sara***. The song still has immeasurable emotional resonance to me when I hear it, so enter that evidence in as Exhibit A.
More relevant to Halloween, however, is the song "Anything can happen on Halloween." It's from a made-for-TV movie called "The Worst Witch" that I must've seen once when I was very young (I seem to remember, in fact, that I being babysat at the time.) The movie is horrible in all the right ways, and has since become sort of a cult-classic along the lines of Plan 9 from Outer Space, but it's the Tim Curry performance that makes it truly legendary^^^^. It doesn't appear on this very worthwhile wikipedia "Worst Films of all-time" list but it probably just wasn't seen by enough people. After watching this movie once when very young I have, for the last 20 years, remembered the song "Anything can happen on Halloween" and had it stuck in my head several times each year.
I never knew what it was, or where it came from (other than faint memories of watching some Halloween movie and seeing the song in it) who sang it, etc. I only remembered the titular line, "Your hair could turn green" and "your sister could turn into a bat." I'm not sure why, but I never thought to google any of those phrases, and when I finally did (about 10 days ago) I was rewarded with a nostalgic treat. I ordered "the worst witch" from Amazon that day and while I wish I could say that "Anything can happen..." takes me back to some magical time in my life (it doesn't) it is actually a fantastic piece of work. It's very campy and poorly done, but at the time it's catchy as hell. Its bizarre non-sequitur lyrics (including the title of this post and couplets like "April first can be fun, new years eve is a bore") and Curry's awesome "scary" faces make for an excellent piece of comedy, well-deserving of it's mild youtube stardom. Here it is:
I've got a whole shitload of topics I want to cover including file-sharing, "bias" as a concept, and why I'm not a vegetarian but this stuff really takes time (John, AKA "Johnny Neverposts" will tell you.) For preparation though, make sure you've purchased the Radiohead album or else you're soon to feel guilty. Also, I just read an article that suggests that "The Week" is owned by "The National Review"- this would make sense given how often they (The Week) cite that damn magazine but it made me want to talk about Bias. Mainly because I'm the only one I know who actually isn't a fan of the Week. However, I keep peeing in people's cokes (see my post on "The Wire" which made Lost fans unhappy, etc.) so I thought I'd hold off.
****And Sara, it should be noted, uses the "Fleetwood mac" beat of "Bass snare, buh-bass snare" that you can hear in most of their best songs. Dreams is probably the most obvious example, but there's also Gypsy , Hold Me, and of course Sara. Rhiannon is a special case, because the percussion is a bit more complicated but the bass is still there, doing its thing.
^^^^ My Sis, the GF and I have been on a pretty serious Tim Curry kick lately, even watching Rocky Horror Picture Show (which shocked the hell out of me, btw- one minute they're singing "Damn it Janet" and then suddenly Tim Curry is blowing Brad on camera after having nailed his fiancee.)
Much beloved site OiNK was shut down recently. I can't put it better than this Stereogum commenter:
Yes, it provided a way to get free versions of widely available popular albums, but it also archived and cataloged the last 50 years of music better than any other place on Earth. Many of which are not readily available for purchase anywhere. It was an excellent record of one field of human achievement and now its gone ... How about the Clash's "Vanilla Tapes" that were lost on a subway train 30 years ago? On Oink, but not in stores.
It was the digital music version of the burning of the Library at Alexandria.
They destroyed the greatest historical archive of rock so they could make a couple more bucks off Rhianna's "Umbrella".
Right up there with "The reptilian jaw splits creating a rudimentary ear (which then evolves and is naturally selected for to create the ear we know today)" we now have "The year 2007" in the greatest moments in music. The reason for the histrionics, of course, is the new Radiohead announcement today. Radiohead have been semi-secretly working on their album "due out sometime in 2008" and they suddenly announced today that it'll come out in 10 days!!! Yeah, like 10 days from now. You've probably seen this but just take this time to be appreciative. Also, you pay however much you want for it from their website (you could buy it for a dollar or 50 dollars if you want.) It's a double album, too and the songs are amazing including my long-time favorite "nude" (formerly called "(Don't get any) big ideas (they're not gonna happen)" which I've had on a bootleg since 99.)
Think about all the incredible music that's been released in 2007, and feel sory for the critic who is aleady dreading his "10 Best Albums" list at the end of the year.
In approximate order of my liking: Arcade Fire- Neon Bible M.I.A.- Kala The Editors- An End has a Start Elliott Smith- New Moon Wilco- Sky Blue Sky* Andrew Bird- Armchair Apocypha Spoon- ga ga ga ga ga The National- The Boxer Feist- The Reminder Stars- In our bedroom after the war The Hives- it hasn't been released yet, but I'm pretty sure about the placement The Go! Team- Proof of Youth Rilo Kiley- under the blacklight The Shins- Wincing the Night Away The White Stripes- Icky Thump LCD Soundsystem- Sound of Silver Voxtrot- Voxtrot Mark Ronson- Version Interpol- Our love to admire Kings of Leon- Because of the Times Okkervil River- The Stage Names Modest Mouse- We were Dead before the ship even sank Bloc Party- Weekend in the city
*It physically pains me to put Wilco this low on the list, that album is incredible.
