Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Today is a change for the better, I wrote you a letter, I'm gonna buy you a sweater

That's how I felt when I went to the Oink page for the first time and had to face facts: I wasn't getting in any time soon. It's rare in our country to find things aren't simply reducible to money and so bumping up against against something that you really want and can't just buy is a uniquely frustrating experience for an American. Like, "Oh a tight-knit collection of music aficionados trading vinyl rips, comedy bootlegs, and 2-minutes-ago leaks? I should be able to buy my way into that." You can't though, and well somehow (exactly how they do it is a matter of contention) they prevent the invites from being sold on ebay or anywhere else. It makes sense too- if they sold them the community would rapidly deteriorate for reasons too complicated to get into now.

Continuing with our theme of "Random awesome content to keep you reading and hopefully sending this to your friends" here's a very amusing short collection of the 6 worst movie scenes ever.

Okay, so what the hell am I talking about? If you didn't already gather from the faux-quote above it's the best music site that's probably ever existed on the internet. You can get any album you can think of with CD quality (or mp3- they have both and more) within a few minutes for free. Bought the new Wilco record on disc, but want to hear it on Vinyl (since Jeff Tweedy says it's better that way)? Just downloaded a lossless vinyl rip. Mitch Hedberg only has two commercial releases and on the second one he sounds like he smoked crack beforehand, so you've been dying for a late-era bootleg? Oink has like 10 of em with jokes I've never heard (Is that an x? I said "no that's an I crossed out because it was too slanted.") Audiobooks? Check. Software programs with custom-coded installation packages so you don't even have to bother with Serialz? Check. Looking like you're bragging when you're really just trying to convey your excitement over finally having scored an invite? Priceless.

This is a 2-d drawing on a sidewalk designed to look 3d- it's called an "anamorphic drawing." This shit is amazing.

When I first heard about it I was intrigued but not obsessed. It's like gmail in that when you hear about it it seems cool but nothing you'll knock down doors to get (of course Gmail's invite only thing was- by their own admission- just a marketing gimmick and they were happy to watch the invites sell on ebay) but once you're on the other side it's like... how did I ever? I found out there was no way I was getting an invite (you just have to know someone, period) and that was that. But I kept running across it: a yahoo! answers that seemed more about sharing in the sadness than getting an invite, a guy's rather neglected blog that suddenly gets overrun with commenters when he reveals he got invited, the leaks coming from Oink, etc.

This is that same drawing from above when not taken at the perfect angle.

Alright, I know that if I keep going with this post I'm going to look like a dick to the 5 people I know who would love Oink (the rest are probably no longer reading.) Here's the good news: In a little while I'll have some invites and the people I know who would actually use them will be invited (and that little while may be months, but if you followed the links in that last paragraph you'll know that that's no time at all) and for now if there's a super-rare hard to find to CD that you want- say the word.

Oh and one more thing, expect some more "you heard it here first" shit like this the new Go! Team and Kanye West singles respectively.

go team!- Grip like a vice

kanye west- can't tell me nuthin'

PS- If anybody can understand the riddle that is the title of this blog post (google all you want) you actually get a real prize worth about 10 bucks. If you know the answer you could probably guess what the prize is. Email me or leave a comment.


mqzoeller said...

"Today is a change for the better, I wrote you a letter. I'm gonna buy you a sweater."
That would be a lyric from one of the country's most underrated groups of all time, the No-Fi Soul Rebellion, who has probably disbanded by now. It is even more proof to my theory though, that the best rockers in the world also work as substitute teachers (Mark from that band, the guy from the Hives, the guy leaving this comment)

-The guy leaving this comment

Cliff Walker said...

Oh, it's a hip test. You hadda been there...

"Anything too stupid to be said is sung."
Voltaire (1694 - 1778)

Matt said...

Yeah, Cliffi Guess you're right. It's hard to have "does anybody know" with prizes since things are google-able these days. I had to find something that wasn't. In my heart of hearts I was hoping that there was some obscure search out there that would tell people so it wouldn't jst be a "hip test."

I should say this though, Matt's comment made them sound perhaps more obscure than they are- they've been reviewed in major publications. They have lyrics up on many of the popular lyrics sites (just not to that song) and they even have some Tabs on a guitar tabs site. They haven't disbanded.

Ben said...

Just to be clear, I did exactly what commenters on my blog are doing now and I was invited within the hour; I had no idea it was tough for most people to get in. Perhaps this is a lesson in perseverance? Or a better lesson might be expanding the Google search term beyond "oink.me.uk". However, that post (mine on Oink) has certainly become a forum for all those wanting invites and the few willing to risk giving them out.

Matt said...

Gotcha. Ben I hope you don't take offense for me saying "rather neglected"- it wasn't intended as an insult so much as a way of showing the traffic spike